i feel kinda bad having a carefree life here
while the people in one way or the other are victims of the killer waves that had hit certain parts of Asia on boxing day.
the news on television is just too dreadful to watch.
every moment its about the rising of death toll.
i mean who can bear to take in all that horror and chaos?
i wish i could do more than just giving my clothes.
it will be nice if i could just volunteer myself.
but parents are another problem.
anyhows, i feel so blessed. really.
and i really thank God for that.
but this wave is a sign. believe me.

but such a sad ending to the beginning of a new year.
reports of the deaths of thousands.
it just doesnt make new year feels like new year.
and talking about new year.
im gonna be fifteen so damn soon.
its less than a month.
at least something to look forward to right? i think.

but new year often makes me think back and wonder.
did i have a happy childhood?
well. i vaguely remember certain stuff as i read through my archives.
but there are other memories that will always be remembered.
i did have a happy childhood if those memories are counted.
did i wasted my life?
at some point of my life i guess my life was wasted in front of the comp, television and stuffs.
for example like now.
but teenages has got their own choices.
so if life was wasted, then its wasted.
time can never be turn back.
be realistic i guess its what we can do.
have i grown to be who i wanna be?
i guess this question is for God to judge me.
people change therefore the world change.
i cant be everything what everyone wants me to be right?
no one perfect.
cos we are plainly just human beings and nothing more.

its a cruel world.
but its the humans that can make a difference right?

its getting late.
i shall try to enjoy the last day of the year.
doodles.